O, Guardian!

2018

“I heard the sound of any none can’t see”

Never did I hear such peculiarity with my ears.

Only a noise of jouska within my head.

Is that you, O’ Guardian?

“I saw something shifted in a blink of my eyes”

Never did I see such oddity with my eyes.

Only a vagary of thoughts within my head.

Is that you, O’ Guardian?

“I felt every touch and love for myself that everyone feels too”

Yet, never did I feel such intimacy throughout my short life.

Only the non-existent; ethereal affection within my head.

You again, O’ Guardian?

—

2023

O’ Guardian!

Could you let me sense what others can do for once?

Could I feel love and intimacy like everybody does?

Could I feel lust and filth going through my veins...

... Just like everybody does?

Why do your cold hands hold me so tightly?

Why do I feel like you possess me completely?

Why do you ensnare any of me from the outside?

Why can’t I have whimsical dalliance without you telling me,

“...It’s gonna ruin your life”?

Answer me, O’ Guardian!

—

2026

O’ Guardian...

The agony of hatred keep drenching my soul

Why does the world have to be so cruel and rude to me?

Is it all the answer of question I raised to you all these time,

... O’ Guardian?

Is it all the why I have to bring you within my names,

... O’ Guardian?

Is it all the reason I have to be born as Inezheta Ramona,

... O’ Guardian?

So we are twins? What a coincidence!

I used to think I shouldn’t be born at all

but you give me the hope to be born and grow with you...

... even if you’re imaginary friends of mine

... even if you get me chained with discipline and principle

... even if I keep screaming to let go every load in my head

... even if I never taste any of my foul desires

— Letter of The Muse; Yearner to Be Humanly Like All Human

Glossary:

*The name Ramona itself means The Wise Gift from The God; The Guardian